Something Missing
by HPpercygirl
Summary: CHAMPION SPOILERS. am•ne•sia amˈnēZHə/ noun 1. a partial or total loss of memory. Directly after the epilogue in CHAMPION. Day and June reconnect over dinner with Tess. Two-shot. Rating changed to M.
1. Day

**Something Missing**

"Hi," I say, "I'm Daniel."

"Hi," she says, "I'm June."

I study June unashamedly throughout dinner. Memories tug at my mind in the familiar frustrating way that I've grown used to. I see flashes of her face – younger, paler – in blurry surroundings that I can't place. But I know it's her, I know she was there.

She looks back at me every few seconds, blushes, then returns her gaze to Tess. Tess, who has her hand on my knee and is chatting easily, filling in gaps in the conversation that I ignore. After she says my name a few times, though, I tune in and look at her.

"What?" I ask, trying to look apologetic.

"I said, how's Antarctica?"

So I tell them, looking back at June. I explain what I do there, what it's like, and what I can do in my free time. I tell them about Eden, too, and don't bother to hide the pride in my voice when I speak of my little brother. He's done so much after everything that has happened to him and I couldn't be more proud.

A smile plays at June's lips as I speak. And it's so familiar that I can almost feel my heart ache to remember who she is.

I push my chair away from the table at the same second that Tess does. She gives me a smile and pats my shoulder. "I'm going to go clean up the kitchen." And then she leaves, and June and I are left in the dining room alone.

I clear my throat and scoot my chair back toward the table. June plays with the bits of food left on her plate as I look at her. When she looks up and meets my eyes, I lower my gaze.

"It's weird," I say to my plate, "memory loss. I've had it explained to me over and over by doctors, and the therapy has helped. But… it's not like a physical wound you can recover from, you know?" I lift my head and meet her eyes. "I have good days and bad. And when I saw you today… I _knew_ that I knew you. I don't think I've ever been surer about anything. Besides Eden. And Tess, and my family. You're someone special, June."

June looks down again, but not before I can catch her smile.

"Who are you?" I ask.

She pauses for a long time before finally answering. "You said it felt like you had found something? That you were missing?" I nod. "Day – Daniel…" She stops, shakes her head, like she's trying to shake the words from her tongue. Or out of her head all together.

And suddenly, I remember. That one small movement, the calculating expression behind her eyes as she paused to decide if she should say what she was thinking… I remember who she is.

"June."

My voice is breathless and my head goes dizzy. The sudden onslaught of emotion is enough to make my stomach churn. June's expression changes to one of confusion at my change of tone, but she doesn't say anything. She just looks at me with those eyes, taking in every detail of the situation like I can now remember her doing countless of times before.

"I'm in love with you," I whisper.

"No." Her voice is sharp, and she sits up with her back completely straight.

"Yes," I argue defensively. "I remember."

"No," she says again, but I cut her off before she can continue.

"I remember. We were – I was seventeen. The war. You were Princeps-Elect, and I was… I'm…" I shake my head, trying to clear a bit of fog left over. When that doesn't work, I go back to what I'm undoubtedly sure of. "I'm in love with you."

"That was ten years ago," June says. Her voice is still hard. Almost angry.

I hold my hand up. My twisted metal ring throws a reflection of the light on the wall. "I remember." When she doesn't respond, I stand up and lean forward on the table, my chair tipping back onto the ground with a loud noise that startles June and makes her flinch. I see Tess look into the room from the corner of my eye but I don't look away from the girl in front of me.

"That coma – when I woke up. Why didn't – it was you. You were there when I woke up. The soldier. You thanked me for my help to the Republic. You – you… you said you didn't know me." June shakes her head. "You told me you didn't know me, June."

"What else do you remember?" Her voice, though only a whisper, cuts through my anger like a knife. I stare at her for a second before she clarifies. "About me. What else do you remember about me, Daniel?"

Without taking my eyes from her, I reach back and right my chair. I slowly sink onto it, not sure how to respond. Finally, I find my voice. "I remember… I remember that you were a soldier. I remember the…" I squeeze my eyes shut and try to dig further into my brain. "Skiz fight. You won, and you joined Tess and I. Then…" I stop. I can't remember any more. This seems to be all June needs to know.

"That's why I don't know you, Daniel," she whispers.

A strangle hollow feeling settles in my stomach. "What do you mean?"

She shakes her head. With a sigh, she sets her fork down and stands up. "I should go. It was… it was good to see you. I'm glad you're doing so well. Send my congratulations to Eden, please." And then she walks away.

I remember her walking away from me as I laid in my hospital bed after waking up from the coma. When she was just a soldier sent by the Republic to thank me for my services. When she was nothing to me.

I can't let her walk away this time. Not now that I know who she is. Not now that I know that I won't be able to stop thinking about her.

"Wait!" I call out, pushing away from the table again and running after her. She's already out the door and down the hall by the time I catch up. "_June!_" Her pace falters, then picks up, and I run to grab her hand.

"Stop," I whisper, clutching her hand in mine. We stand in perfect silence for a long stretch of seconds. Then she finally turns to look at me.

I kiss her.

I don't know what possesses me to do so, but it feels like I have no other choice. I feel June push against my chest and I'm about to let her go… but then she falls into me and I can feel her return the kiss. She opens her mouth and lets me in as I wrap my arms around her back and pull her body against mine. Her hands run up my arms and around my neck – her fingers grab at the short hair at the back of my head. I moan softly and turn to press her against the wall. Our kiss turns desperate. We're both grabbing, pulling, at anything we can get our hands on. She's scratching my neck and I've got my hands twisted in the shirt under her military jacket.

After minutes, hours, I don't know, we break away from our embrace. The empty hall is filled with the sound of our heavy breathing. My head is clouded in a way that is entirely unfamiliar and exhilarating at the same time.

June's the first to break the silence. "How long are you in town?" She asks in a voice barely above a whisper.

"A week," I reply, my eyes still closed.

"I'll see you later," she said in the same tone as before. I feel her move away from me, out from under my arms. I don't move. I'm afraid to break the dream I might be having. Did she really say 'I'll see you later'?

She kisses my cheek, just the softest brush of her lips against my skin, and I hear her footsteps echo as she walks away from me.

I don't know how long I stay like that, leaning against the wall with my eyes closed. I can't think about anything. Just June, just the relentless knowledge that I'm in love with her. And I can't remember everything I should about her. And I'm going to see her again.

I'm going to see her again.


	2. June

**Important Note: The rating of this fic has been changed to M. This chapter contains sexual content (a little more detailed than in the book, I think, but not graphic). Please do not read if you are uncomfortable with that topic. Also, I should probably mention beforehand that this chapter is told from June's point of view. Enjoy the chapter, and thank you very much for reading!**

"Hi," He says, "I'm Daniel."

"Hi," I say, "I'm June."

It was what I wanted. Ten years ago, I had wished that Day and I had met on a random street… he'd introduce himself as Daniel, I'd introduce myself as June, we'd date, get to know each other, and go from there. Of course that wasn't what had happened. Ten years ago I went to Hell and back with Day by my side. Two kids in a world that needed more from them than they had to give.

When I walked away from Day back in the hospital, I did it for his own good. At least that's what I told myself. But now, looking back, I know it was for my own selfish reasons as well. I couldn't let Day give himself to me like he had. Not when I took away so much of his life.

Yet, here I am, waiting for him. Inviting him back into my life like nothing ever happened between us. I know it's wrong. And I'm trying to find it in myself to call it off.

There's a knock at the door. I straighten my shirt, run a hand through my hair, and answer it.

Day's appearance takes breath away. I didn't see him dressed up very often when we were teenagers, and even now the sight startles me. His short white-blonde hair is hard to get used to, too. I always imagine him with it long.

"June?" he says, a smile tugging at his lips. I will myself not to blush and step aside wordlessly, gesturing for him to enter my apartment. He does. A quick glance around shows him that I'm the only one there.

"Ollie?" he asks, turning to me. A strange expression is in his eyes.

I shake my head. "Died a few years ago. He was old, you know." I'm proud of myself for keeping my voice neutral. If Day remembers my dog, what else does he remember? "Dinner's out, if you want to eat." I don't know where my awkwardness is coming from. Thankfully, Day doesn't acknowledge it and sits at the table. I join him and dish up plates silently.

We eat, for the most part, in a comfortable silence. Day tells me more about Eden and how the three days since our dinner with Tess have gone. I tell him about my patrols, though there isn't much to tell. The Republic has been pretty controlled lately. Boring. Safe.

After dinner we end up on the couch. I can't remember quite how we got there or who suggested it. We sit a respectable distance away from each other. My knees are up on my cushion, facing him, and he's turned toward me with an arm on the back of the couch and his head in his hand.

"I've been thinking about you a lot, June," he says suddenly. It's a complete one-eighty from the previous topic of conversation – his work in Antarctica. He doesn't give me enough time to respond before he's speaking again. "I can't get you out of my goddy head. And I've asked Tess, I've asked Eden, but they won't tell me anything. I'm just getting bits and pieces of us, June. But I do know there _is _an us."

"Was," I correct automatically. That stalls him, and I silently curse myself for bringing the look of hurt onto his face.

"Are you with someone?" His voice is barely a whisper.

I consider lying. For a split second. "No," I answer. "I was. Not anymore, though." _Because I couldn't love him like I love you._

"Then why can't we try again, June?"

I feel tears prick my eyes. This is my Day, sitting in front of me. He's so entirely himself, emotional, vulnerable, and now I'm remembering every single moment we've had alone together, our night together, and I want to cross the space between us and lose myself in the man that I used to love. That I still love.

Then I see the vision of his mother being shot in the head. His brother facing the firing squad. Day's body being beaten. Tears continue to sting my eyes, threatening to spill over.

"I can't do it to you again, Day," I whisper. His brow furrows at the nickname, but I keep going. "You may not be able to remember, but I know what happened. And I won't let myself hurt you like that again. I won't let you give yourself to me when I've taken so much from you. I won't let you. I won't –"

His voice, barely above a whisper, effectively interrupts me. "When," he asks, "have you ever been able to tell me what to do?"

I can't help it. I look at him. He's smirking, and there's a sort of mischievous glint in his eyes that is so familiar it makes my head spin. The tears spill out of my eyes and he leans over, wrapping his arms around me and holding me against him. I bury my face in his neck, embarrassed to be embraced like this but loving it too much to pull away.

"I can't," I whisper, "I can't let you do this." But Day only tips my chin up and kisses me.

This kiss is slow and sweet, nothing like our heated one in the hallway three days earlier. I can tell that Day's trying to calm me down and make me forget what it is that I'm arguing about. It works. I hold onto him, savoring the taste of his lips and the feel of his hair between my fingers.

When he pulls away I'm momentarily at a loss. I blink my eyes open slowly and look at him to see a smirk on his lips.

"I've always been your biggest problem, Commander Imparis. You've never been able to control me. And I do what I want. You know that better than anyone."

Suddenly, I'm so tired. I'm tired of being practical June Imparis, military-logic mind and the one who always does the right thing for everyone else. For once I want to be June Imparis, twenty-seven year old woman who's in love with a man she hasn't seen for ten years. I just want to let go. I want to be happy, no matter the consequences it might bring.

And at this moment, I think I deserve that much.

"Come on," I whisper, taking his hand and standing up. He follows me without question as I lead him to my bedroom and sit down at the foot of the bed. He stands over me, a question in his eyes that I can't help but answer.

"I love you, Daniel," I say, my voice shaking slightly. "And I've missed you so much."

That's all it takes to get him to kiss me again. He leans over me, tangles a hand in my hair, and kisses me slowly and passionately. I let myself get lost in it this time. I hold him close, digging my fingernails into his shirt, as if I'm afraid that he'll disappear if I don't keep a tight hold on him.

Somehow I end up lying back on the bed, my head below the pillows, with Day on top of me. His jacket's off, and his hands are under my shirt.

"Take it off," I whisper breathlessly. A look of surprise crosses his face but he does as he's told. He drops the shirt off the bed. The small breeze it creates is enough to lift a small object off my nightstand. It makes a quiet tinkling noise as it spins back into place and catches Day's attention.

My paperclip ring.

I watch Day's expression as memories slowly rise to the surface in his brain. He stares incredulously at the ring, then at his own, then at me.

"You kept it," he whispers.

I can only smile as he kisses me again. We break apart so I can take his shirt off and he can undo my bra. The clothes are discarded on the floor and our lips crash together again.

Our hands seem to be everywhere at once. Day's touch is gentle, just how I remember it being. My hands move without my express permission. I'm too busy taking in all of Day that I can to bother thinking about what I'm actually doing. It's been too long since I've been with someone like this. It's been too long since I've been with Day like this. I feel my body arch with his touch, trying desperately to get closer to him. My hands roam along his stomach and chest and shoulders and arms, feeling his muscles tense at my touch then relax. His torso is tattooed with scars – bullet wounds, knife wounds, marks from stories that I've never even heard – that I brush over gently.

The rest of our clothes are forgotten. The only sound in the room is of our breathing. Day looks me in the eye and I give him a nod, breathless, lips parted and eyes half-lidded in pleasure as he enters me.

Our bodies move together effortlessly, like they've been waiting all these years just to do it again. I lay my head back and Day kisses my neck. I lose myself in him, his body over mine, his breath hot on my skin. His pace picks up as tension builds and finally spills over, shooting stars behind my eyes. Day calls my name. His body shakes, and I realize mine is doing the same thing.

After, we lay together in silence. I close my eyes, enjoying the feeling of Day playing with my hair. I find his free hand with one of mine and give it a gentle squeeze before looking at him.

"I forgot to tell you," he says after a moment, still looking at me, "Eden got the position. We're moving back to Los Angeles."

I close my eyes and smile again. Day didn't forget to tell me. I'm sure about that. He was just waiting to see if he should tell me that he's moving back or not. Tonight must have been enough to convince him that I want him to be here.

Surprisingly, I don't feel guilty. I don't feel the nagging in the back of my head that says that I'm bad for him. The time will come when he knows what happened to his family, and why. And we'll cross that bridge when it comes to it – hopefully together. Because the past can't be changed, and I have to deal with the consequences of who I used to be. But that doesn't mean that I can't forgive myself if Day forgives me, too.

I roll over, fitting my body against his, and give him a soft kiss. "I guess," I whisper, "I'll see you later, then, Daniel."


End file.
